Thursday, August 20, 2020
Wednesday, August 19, 2020
Tuesday, August 18, 2020
A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch:
"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look." She said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?"
"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day and also enjoy the occassional cigar." He said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never exercise."
"That's amazing.” Said the woman. "How old are you?""Twenty-six." He said!
Monday, August 17, 2020
We'll set the tone just like the theaters, dark lighting, porn movies playing in two rooms.
If you are a hot wife, cum slut, cuckold, love gangbangs or just plain love sex with multiple men this is your event.
Since we have two rooms, one will be designated a room for straight people. The second room will be for crossdressers, trans, bi and gay. It's a wall to wall sex party and since it's a Bangaroo party, there's no restrictions on the number of men that can attend. Probably need a few that can step up and perform for the ladies.
Sure there's no gloryholes, no booths, no funky smoke smell or anything like that just porn flixing and chill at the Club Bangaroo Saturday Night Porn Meeting September 19. Doors open starting at 7p. Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org for details and to start the RSVP process.
Top Five Status Messages You May Have Missed This Past Week August 17 2020
5. Imagine how cool it would be if we lost weight every time we farted.
4. I turned off my TV today and made my kids play board games like it was in 1955. Now I know why all our grandparents are alcoholics.
3. People with LED headlights: I'm super happy that you're able to see the hair on a raccoon's asshole from a mile away but I can't see.
2. Just helped my neighbor bury a rolled up carpet in the woods. Her boyfriend would've done it but he's out of town.
1. If I walk into a barber shop and the barber is bald then I’m leaving...what the fuck do you know about hair?
Monday, August 10, 2020
Did you know that Red Wine day falls on Friday August 28th this year? So couples and single ladies grab your bottle of your favorite wine (or whatever liquid encouragement you want) as we throw a Club Crave Liquid Encouragement Motel Suite party Saturday August 29th in Nashville starting at 7:00 p.m. We'll bring a few bottles of Red Wine to share with the partygoers and of course the much stronger drunk gummy bears as well.
How's how this party works:
1. This party will be hosted in a very nice two room spacious motel suite in Nashville. The suite will have two beds for playing in and a big room for socializing in.
2. This is a Club Crave party meaning it's for couples and single ladies. We are allowing five eligible single males to attend on the RSVP, first come first serve basis. To be eligible, you must have attended a party or meet and greet. No new single males.
3. If you are a couple and would like to sponsor a single male, that is fine. The person you sponsor can be new. You must arrive with the single male as we won't allow the male in unless the sponsor is there as well.
4. If you are a single female you may accompany a single male as a date. The single guy can be new to the Club Crave party scene. There will be NO new single males admitted without a couple or a single female sponsor or date.
5. Party is BYOB, Bring your own ice and cooler to keep your liquid encouragement cold if you so desire. We will provide Cokes, Sprites, Dr. Pepper and Water. If you require any other beverage, bring it.
6. We will provide some party foods (pizza rolls and chicken nuggets-you'll have to microwave them yourself) such as chips, dips, cookies etc.
This party EVERYONE will go through the vetting system to RSVP. This means you MUST email us at email@example.com. We will never ask any information from you that we will not give of ourselves. For example, you do not have to provide a copy of your drivers license to be eligible to come to this party but you will have to email us to do the RSVP process. We will be aware of everyone that is intending to come to this party.
Door donations are as follows: Single males-$30, Couples-$20, Single Females-Free.
We will have a couple of door prizes to give away plus working on some other giveaway items as well. So grab your red wine, your beer, your vodka, whatever works for you and let's celebrate Liquid Encouragement Saturday night August 29th in Nashville.
5. Is it wrong to follow rioters home and burn down their property....asking for a friend
4. Dudes be 30+ with their middle finger up in every photo, what are you so mad at? Your credit score?
3. Just got kicked out of church for screaming "Fuck the Devil", like I thought we hated his ass
2. Jehovah Witnesses seemed a little shocked when I asked them if they were here for the orgy.
1. I'm in big trouble if my coworkers ever find out I don't really have Tourette's.