5. We just bought 12 pounds of cheese. Won't need toilet paper now.
4. If you're gonna call the cops every time you spot me in the bushes, I don't think this relationship is going to work.
3. Does anyone know how to get a cum stain off a mattress? This sales rep from Ashley Furniture is threatening to make me buy it.
2. I just Googled "The Best Things To Do In Europe" and your mom's name came up.
1. Having sexual fantasies about your teacher is fine unless you're homeschooled.